Unsuccessfully. For those of you who have read the book, The Game, by Neil Strauss, you'll know what I am talking about. For those of you in the dark, maybe the rest of the book title will help: Undercover in the Secret Society of Pickup Artists.
It's an autobiography of a journalist who infiltrated this "Secret Society" and blows apart all the rules and tricks these wanna-be Pickup Artists use to try and pick up (sarge) women. I finished the book last week and distinctly remember shaking my head in wonder and laughing out loud at sections of the book that described in detail the techniques that these men would use to pick up women. 'Lo and behold, last night at the On Anon bar/club in London, Maria and I were the unwilling targets of these very techniques.
It all started with 2 men coming up to us, each was the other's 'wing'. One of them was 'peacocking' by wearing a white fedora mobster style hat. Peacocking is used to draw people's attention, often by looking outrageous, and it also acts as a good opening line to start a conversation. The particular 'opener' the guy who wasn't wearing the hat was, "Do you think my friend looks like Al Capone wearing this hat or does he look stupid?" I personally thought he looked stupid but was too polite to say. They then tried to establish some quick rapport by asking questions eliciting lots of yes responses,this is the 'yes-ladder' technique, "Do you speak English?" My response - "Yes". "High five!", followed by more stupid questions and more juvenile high-fiving action.
The next technique was to ask questions out of the ordinary, ie. not the normal pick up line gambits. The question the Al Capone-wannabe asked was, "What is the most difficult word you can think of in the English language?". "Err...I dunno", was my response. "What word rhymes with mouth?", "South?", "High Five!!"
It was around this time Maria pulled out the best defence of all against these pick-up artists, 'The Fiance'. Sam the Man saved us.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Mixed bathing...and london living
I should add, both mutually exclusive! I had a very eye-opening last few days in Japan. The first of which was at the gorgeous onsen in Takaragawa - Gunma prefecture... The onsen is supposedly the best outdoor onsen in Japan and I must agree it was very impressive. There were 4 outdoor baths, though as with all things steeped in Japanese tradition, the women baths were 1/4 the size and quality of the male baths, so what they did was open the male baths to the women bathers with the condition that women had to bathe with the bath towel on. This is fine in theory, I just wished they had the same standards for the men, who got these tiny little hand towels that either covered the front of back, unfortunately not both. And not even the front very well at that. Luckily men have no qualms strutting about with their asses bared for all to see.
I've always been curious about what a bunch of naked men do in onsens. Now I know. I was lucky enough to have the outdoor baths to myself, that was until a bunch of rowdy men came hooning across the rickety bridge, jumping up and down trying to shake each other off, slapping each other's butts with their little hand towels and taking photos of themselves. So I don't know whether that is normal onsen behaviour for men. I hope not.
It was definitely uncomfortable but the scenery certainly took my mind off all the nekid men there. The onsen was set right beside a gushing river, all around were trees that were just beginning to turn into fall colours, the stone statues and rustic lanterns that dotted the baths just made it all so picturesque and timeless.
The last onsen on my trip was all the way up north in Akita in a little village that seemed far from civilisation. The huts still had straw thatched roofs, the architecture and olden ways of cooking in an irori (fireplace) was still retained. The meals were made of fresh seasonal produce grown right in the valley. The baths were old but my last night bathing in the outdoor pool and lying under the moon and stars was magical.
So back to civilisation! London to be exact. I've been here for a few days and am feeling very comfortable here. I find it all very familiar but of course randomly coming out of an underground station and being confronted by castle walls or a palace here and there certainly make the experience purely British.
So it's my 2nd day of job hunting, a scary prospect being unemployed but luckily I have good friends to doss with (thanks Hung and Colin!) and I'm sure I'll settle right in.
I've always been curious about what a bunch of naked men do in onsens. Now I know. I was lucky enough to have the outdoor baths to myself, that was until a bunch of rowdy men came hooning across the rickety bridge, jumping up and down trying to shake each other off, slapping each other's butts with their little hand towels and taking photos of themselves. So I don't know whether that is normal onsen behaviour for men. I hope not.
It was definitely uncomfortable but the scenery certainly took my mind off all the nekid men there. The onsen was set right beside a gushing river, all around were trees that were just beginning to turn into fall colours, the stone statues and rustic lanterns that dotted the baths just made it all so picturesque and timeless.
The last onsen on my trip was all the way up north in Akita in a little village that seemed far from civilisation. The huts still had straw thatched roofs, the architecture and olden ways of cooking in an irori (fireplace) was still retained. The meals were made of fresh seasonal produce grown right in the valley. The baths were old but my last night bathing in the outdoor pool and lying under the moon and stars was magical.
So back to civilisation! London to be exact. I've been here for a few days and am feeling very comfortable here. I find it all very familiar but of course randomly coming out of an underground station and being confronted by castle walls or a palace here and there certainly make the experience purely British.
So it's my 2nd day of job hunting, a scary prospect being unemployed but luckily I have good friends to doss with (thanks Hung and Colin!) and I'm sure I'll settle right in.
Sunday, October 01, 2006
Onsen heaven in Kyushu
I just came back from a week spent in Kyushu, the southernmost island of Japan. It is onsen heaven down there, with hot springs, sand and mud baths wherever people decide to dig deep enough.
My first port of call was Beppu, a city cluttered with hot spring resorts and the 8 jigoku (hells). I got off the shinkansen and headed straight for Takegawara Bathhouse. This is one of the oldest public baths in the city, its key attraction being the pit of black sand that people willingly get buried in. I changed into the yukata provided and gingerly laid down in the hollow that the old lady attendant had dug out for me. She then shoveled the warm black sand over me and patted it down hard. I was immobile for about 15 minutes and was sweating under the heat. The old lady made sure my forehead was mopped of sweat and kept asking me if everything was ok. After 15 minutes I rose up from the hot sand not unlike those return of the living dead ghouls. That was a fun experience though not particularly relaxing since all I could think about was how much I wanted to move when I couldn't.
From there I caught a bus to my ryokan (Japanese inn) which was also where the Tour of the Hells are. The term hell is used to describe the boiling ponds of water, heated by the underground volcanic activity. Each hell has a distinctive characteristic, though some seemed really tacky, like the hell where crocodiles are bred or where some mechanical hippo greet the tourists. I only made it to one, the Blue Hell which was really picturesque. In Japanese they called it the Sea Jigoku bc the water is a bright blue and there are billows of steam coming from it. That was a nice one but I didn't see the point in paying to see other 'hells' just because the water was a different colour.
For that entire week I visited at least 3 different onsens a day. Each of these onsens have indoor and outdoor baths of which I would laze in for a few hours at a time. I have never been so clean in my life! Some of the more memorable onsens was visiting a local mud bath where all the elderly women there had really beautiful skin. I guess there are definitely therapeutic benefits to soaking in the hot hot mud pool, hopping out to let the mud dry, then hopping back into the pool again. I only did that 3 times before the mud pool just got too hot. My skin felt baby smooth after that though.
Another cool one was at this 5 star place called Suginoi Palace. There were hilltop views, terraced pools, steam room, aromatherapy bath, jacuzzi, hot tubs, the absolute works. Felt very pampered after that one. It seemed I would not be able to top it but I did - with my next stop at Kurokawa Onsen up in the mountains. I stayed in a Japanese ryokan in the middle of the woods where there were different huts that you bathe on your own, or communal outdoor pools. It was all very relaxing until I accidentally stepped into an outdoor bath that was for mixed male & female bathing. I couldn't get out of there fast enough! Reading the English descriptions of the different baths that night over dinner, I realised I had stepped into the "Mixed Promiscuous Bath"! oops.
The Kurokawa Onsen area was in the town of Aso, with the largest active volcano caldera in the world. Unfortunately on both the days that I visited the area I was told the poisonous gas levels from the crater was too high so I couldn't hike up there. Since I had originally scheduled a full day for hiking I found myself at somewhat of a loose end, so I took a few trains out to Fukuoka, one of the main cities in Kyushu. It was actually really nice being out in the city after being in small towns for the past few days. I booked myself into a Capsule Hotel, something I have always wanted to try in Japan. I wasn't really sure what to expect but I found it all very accommodating. They devoted 3 floors for the women customers, the first floor contained the capsules, the next was the bath area (complete with sauna and pool) and the third floor was the relaxation area where I lounged about in the reclining chairs reading and watching tv. The capsule was certainly novel, I chose the top capsule so I had to clammer my way up and slip into the compartment. I stretched out and found it surprisingly roomy. There was a tv and radio in there, filled with the usual Japanese tv shows plus a random p0rn channel. I was so tired from all the traveling I did that day I was out like a light.
On Sat I took a day trip out to Tokyo to do some shopping and people watching. I always seem to think I will like Tokyo a little more each time I go, but it never seems to be the case. Tokyo is just too big to properly appreciate without spending at least a week there and the people seem perpetually in a rush. I was only there a few hours and already felt tired and harried. I went to Harajuku which was a little more fun, lots of people watching though not as outrageous as it used to be.
Tomorrow I'm heading up north, a few hours past Tokyo to some famous onsens. The first is to Nyuto Onsen in Akita, and the next to Takaragawa Onsen in Gunma. Takaragawa is famous for its river hot springs, whereas Nyuto is in a secluded valley of hot springs and rustic inns. They both sound relaxing and the perfect way to unwind before heading to the hustle and bustle of London.
This will be my last update from Japan. It's been wonderful here, I've loved every minute and I'm sad to be leaving. Thanks Dwayne for being such a fantastic host! =)
My first port of call was Beppu, a city cluttered with hot spring resorts and the 8 jigoku (hells). I got off the shinkansen and headed straight for Takegawara Bathhouse. This is one of the oldest public baths in the city, its key attraction being the pit of black sand that people willingly get buried in. I changed into the yukata provided and gingerly laid down in the hollow that the old lady attendant had dug out for me. She then shoveled the warm black sand over me and patted it down hard. I was immobile for about 15 minutes and was sweating under the heat. The old lady made sure my forehead was mopped of sweat and kept asking me if everything was ok. After 15 minutes I rose up from the hot sand not unlike those return of the living dead ghouls. That was a fun experience though not particularly relaxing since all I could think about was how much I wanted to move when I couldn't.
From there I caught a bus to my ryokan (Japanese inn) which was also where the Tour of the Hells are. The term hell is used to describe the boiling ponds of water, heated by the underground volcanic activity. Each hell has a distinctive characteristic, though some seemed really tacky, like the hell where crocodiles are bred or where some mechanical hippo greet the tourists. I only made it to one, the Blue Hell which was really picturesque. In Japanese they called it the Sea Jigoku bc the water is a bright blue and there are billows of steam coming from it. That was a nice one but I didn't see the point in paying to see other 'hells' just because the water was a different colour.
For that entire week I visited at least 3 different onsens a day. Each of these onsens have indoor and outdoor baths of which I would laze in for a few hours at a time. I have never been so clean in my life! Some of the more memorable onsens was visiting a local mud bath where all the elderly women there had really beautiful skin. I guess there are definitely therapeutic benefits to soaking in the hot hot mud pool, hopping out to let the mud dry, then hopping back into the pool again. I only did that 3 times before the mud pool just got too hot. My skin felt baby smooth after that though.
Another cool one was at this 5 star place called Suginoi Palace. There were hilltop views, terraced pools, steam room, aromatherapy bath, jacuzzi, hot tubs, the absolute works. Felt very pampered after that one. It seemed I would not be able to top it but I did - with my next stop at Kurokawa Onsen up in the mountains. I stayed in a Japanese ryokan in the middle of the woods where there were different huts that you bathe on your own, or communal outdoor pools. It was all very relaxing until I accidentally stepped into an outdoor bath that was for mixed male & female bathing. I couldn't get out of there fast enough! Reading the English descriptions of the different baths that night over dinner, I realised I had stepped into the "Mixed Promiscuous Bath"! oops.
The Kurokawa Onsen area was in the town of Aso, with the largest active volcano caldera in the world. Unfortunately on both the days that I visited the area I was told the poisonous gas levels from the crater was too high so I couldn't hike up there. Since I had originally scheduled a full day for hiking I found myself at somewhat of a loose end, so I took a few trains out to Fukuoka, one of the main cities in Kyushu. It was actually really nice being out in the city after being in small towns for the past few days. I booked myself into a Capsule Hotel, something I have always wanted to try in Japan. I wasn't really sure what to expect but I found it all very accommodating. They devoted 3 floors for the women customers, the first floor contained the capsules, the next was the bath area (complete with sauna and pool) and the third floor was the relaxation area where I lounged about in the reclining chairs reading and watching tv. The capsule was certainly novel, I chose the top capsule so I had to clammer my way up and slip into the compartment. I stretched out and found it surprisingly roomy. There was a tv and radio in there, filled with the usual Japanese tv shows plus a random p0rn channel. I was so tired from all the traveling I did that day I was out like a light.
On Sat I took a day trip out to Tokyo to do some shopping and people watching. I always seem to think I will like Tokyo a little more each time I go, but it never seems to be the case. Tokyo is just too big to properly appreciate without spending at least a week there and the people seem perpetually in a rush. I was only there a few hours and already felt tired and harried. I went to Harajuku which was a little more fun, lots of people watching though not as outrageous as it used to be.
Tomorrow I'm heading up north, a few hours past Tokyo to some famous onsens. The first is to Nyuto Onsen in Akita, and the next to Takaragawa Onsen in Gunma. Takaragawa is famous for its river hot springs, whereas Nyuto is in a secluded valley of hot springs and rustic inns. They both sound relaxing and the perfect way to unwind before heading to the hustle and bustle of London.
This will be my last update from Japan. It's been wonderful here, I've loved every minute and I'm sad to be leaving. Thanks Dwayne for being such a fantastic host! =)
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